Waiting: Juli and Juan

Waiting: Juli and Juan

“The need is great, and the opportunity is huge to have a lasting, magnificent impact on a kid’s life. It truly is. There’s no way to overstate that.” – Mom, whose son is on BBBS waiting list.

Big Brothers Big Sisters of Central Texas regularly celebrates the growth and relationships of our matches. We see daily the positive impact one-to-one mentoring has on kids and families. It’s why we work so hard to recruit Bigs and get kids off our waiting list and into the matches that can help them thrive.

Juli and her son Juan have been waiting for Juan to be matched with a Big Brother since April of 2024. “Juan’s dad was incarcerated when my son was almost two,” said Juli. “He recently turned 14. It’s really hard on the whole family when someone is absent.”

Though Juan’s dad is no longer in prison, a reconnection with his son has not taken place. “My son has never really had a male influence in his life,” said Juli. “Once his dad got out, he had a new family. It was confusing for everyone.”

The situation has been compounded by a long list of broken promises from family and friends. “Juan has been let down a lot,” said Juli. “There are other family members and friends who have said they were going to take Juan to do this or that, but never did. Or they started off helping him and just kind of fell off through the years.”

That is when Juli signed up with BBBS. “I thought it would be good for him to have someone consistent in his life,” said Juli. “Someone that wasn’t just going to say they’d do something and then not be there. He would have someone he could depend on.”

But the need for a mentor goes beyond reliability. “I think a Big would help Juan interact more socially,” said Juli. “He is very advanced for his age, so things that would typically entertain a 14-year-old bore him.”

When he is bored Juan is not getting into trouble, but Juli is concerned that it is causing him to be more isolated, withdrawing into his room and his cell phone. “Juan gets frustrated when he’s with friends his age because they don’t understand the things that interest him. It makes him feel awkward,” said Juli. “He’s more comfortable with adults than kids his own age. It kind of isolates him.”

That isolation impacts his schoolwork. “He is very smart,” said Juli. “But he is not passing his classes not because he can’t, but because he doesn’t want to apply himself.”

Juli thinks a Big would make a real difference in Juan’s life. “It would be someone who would be able to keep him interested, engaged,” said Juli. “Someone who would offer alternatives; let’s go play basketball or do this or that. Who knows how big of a difference it could make?”

“This is going to make me cry, but Bigs are really important because as mentors they could potentially be saving a child from a bad situation that they, nor their family, even realize they’re in,” said Juli.

Juan and Juli are very excited about the possibility of being matched. And his request for a mentor is simple. “I’m looking forward to having someone to listen to music with,” said Juan.

“Deftones is my favorite band,” he added, “And I got tickets for my birthday! It would be really cool if I had a Big by March so we could go together and maybe go get Chinese buffet before! I’m a huge fan of music and food and I just want to be able to spend time with someone who wants to spend time with me.”

BBBS was founded in Austin in the 1970’s when several men in the community decided that they wanted to help boys without fathers. They recognized that these boys were struggling socially, emotionally, and academically, and they wanted to provide positive male role models who could help them succeed.

Fast forward 50 plus years and the need for male mentors is as great today as when the agency first began. For every male who signs up to be a mentor, two more are needed. Over 60% of the kids on our waiting list are boys, and we need more men to match them with.

Juan and Juli are patiently waiting for the day that BBBS calls with a match and their mentoring journey can begin. They know male mentors are essential to helping boys achieve success whether it’s fishing, playing catch with a baseball or… just listening to music. Juan has the playlist ready.